Monday, February 28, 2005

Honeymooners: A Cautionary Tale

2/28 Book Review:

"Kinder's rambunctious saga of the booze-fueled lives of two emerging writers in the 1970s is noteworthy more as a literary event than as a work of fiction. The central character, Ralph Crawford, appears to be based on Raymond Carver, and his brawling best friend, Jim Stark, seems to be Kinder himself, who was in turn purported to be one of the models for the college professor in Michael Chabon's Wonder Boys. Thus, this book, in the making for more than 25 years, is the real-life equivalent of the long-awaited magnum opus over which Chabon's professor agonized....Kinder does generate considerable sympathy for his characters as they rehash the multiple betrayals of their youth. Anyone interested in contemporary fiction will want a voyeuristic peek at this take on how one famous writer may have lived in the freewheeling '70s, but in the end, the novel reminds us that while some drunks may be geniuses early in the day, they all act much the same after the tenth drink."

-Booklist

Great Moments in Socialized Medicine

Eight-year-old Tilly Merrell hadn't had a normal meal since she was an infant, and the San Francisco Chronicle explains why:

British doctors found that the food she swallowed went into her lungs instead of her stomach, causing devastating lung infections. They said she had isolated bulbar palsy, and their solution was to feed her through a stomach tube. Forever. But having a backpack with a food pump wired to her stomach wasn't much of a life for a girl whose favorite smell is bacon frying--a girl who once broke through a locked kitchen door in an effort to sneak some cheese. So her family got help from their community of Warndon, about 120 miles north of London, raising enough money to take Tilly, now 8, on a 5,000-mile journey they hoped might change her life, a journey to Lucile Salter Packard Children's Hospital at Stanford University.

Doctors there examined her and found out there was nothing wrong with her. Now she's eating normally, and loving it. Oh well, at least British medicine saved her from British food.

Is the World listening?

Meanwhile in Cairo, Egypt's President Hosni Mubarak, who succeeded the assassinated Anwar Sadat in 1981 and has periodically won sham elections ever since, made a "dramatic decision to allow a competitive presidential election," which "comes amid a behind-the-scenes struggle by the Bush administration and Congress to require Cairo to spend part of its annual $2 billion in U.S. aid on political and economic reform," the Los Angeles Times reports:

"Officials said they did not believe that U.S. pressure alone forced Mubarak's hand. "U.S. pressure was certainly material," said an official who spoke on condition of anonymity. "But [Mubarak's] people are sitting watching TV. You've seen free elections in Palestine, free elections in Iraq, hundreds of thousands of people demonstrating on the streets in Lebanon, illegitimate elections overturned in Georgia, illegitimate elections being overturned in Ukraine. . . . It's a combination of all these things."

Those who thought Arab democracy was a hopeless cause are looking more and more naive.

Freedom is on the march

Lebanese ministers forced to quit-Mr Karami denies any involvement in the attack on Mr Hariri

"Huge celebrations have erupted in Beirut after the Lebanese government announced its resignation following two weeks of popular protests. Tens of thousands of people waved Lebanese flags and demanded that Syria remove its troops from the country. Prime Minister Omar Karami announced the resignation two weeks after the murder of his predecessor Rafik Hariri. The US hailed it as an "opportunity" for Lebanon, calling for fair elections free of Syrian influence....
The immediate reaction from Syria, which backs the Lebanese government, was non-committal, saying only that it was "an internal affair" for Lebanon. However, a BBC correspondent in Damascus says the Syrian authorities must be worried the situation in Lebanon is spiralling out of their control and might result in a new government demanding the immediate withdrawal of Syria's estimated 15,000 troops in the country."

Williams, speedy times draw attention

INDIANAPOLIS (AP) - Matt Jones and Jerome Mathis turned heads Sunday with their speed. Mike Williams did the same just by working out.
Jones, from Arkansas, ran the fastest time ever by a quarterback at the NFL combine, unofficially clocked at 4.41 seconds in the 40-yard dash.
Mathis turned in the fastest time this year at the combine with an unofficial 4.32. But longtime combine veterans Bill Parcells and Gil Brandt said he was officially clocked at 4.25 - faster than Deion Sanders.
Williams was the biggest surprise. The former Southern Cal wide receiver had said Friday that he wouldn't run this weekend, but after watching some other top receivers run, Williams changed his mind.
"It was good to see Mike out there running," Tennessee coach Jeff Fisher said. "It's great for the clubs to see so many guys running."
Williams ran two 4.59s, but was not among the five fastest receivers.
Mathis, who played at Hampton in Virginia, was the fastest wideout at 4.32. Indiana's Courtney Roby was next at 4.36 and South Carolina's Troy Williamson was third at 4.38.
After Jones, there was a huge drop-off among quarterbacks. Louisville's Stefan LeFors was second-fastest at 4.62, and Sam Houston State's Dustin Long was next at 4.67. But all three were faster than running back Maurice Clarett, who was slower than 4.7 on Saturday.
One of the more intriguing quarterback prospects, Adrian McPherson, ran a 4.72 but injured his left quad.

Music Appreciation Made Easy

As I was lying in bed last night the talk radio program which I was listening to ended before I was asleep, to my horror a blues hour came next. I hate the blues. However since I sleep in a tent and a dark cold shop separated me from the stereo (I had left my remote next to the stereo), I could not muster the energy to leave my electric blanketted sleep cave. I layed there through a few song suffering. Someone had these blues, which may have been worse than those blues, but they also had the can't remember shit blues. It was a fucking nightmare. I was just about to give up and leave the tent, then out of laziness I devised a new game. I first imagined that the musicians singing were white cpa's, then they became Ex-presidents. This was hilarous, I highly recommend it. I could see them all making orgasmic facial expressions as they played. The last thing I remember them morphing into were my dead pets. I mention this technique because I think it may work in any situation where you are being exposed to music you don't like. I know this has been a problem for me in the past.

winners never quit

my jail shoes on
the well kept cemetary lawn
both of them weeping
their one good son now was gone
the irony to see my dad down on his knees
crying out to jesus
but lord i've always done what's right
and all the while
the good lord smiled
and looked the other way
when we were kids
i did my best to make them proud
it just wasn't in me
i could not fly straight to save my life
their big success is now their biggest failure
their golden child has been dethroned
their reputation is now in ruin
their tower to heaven has come tumbling down

Literary and Historical Notes:

It was on this day in 1953 that James Watson and Francis Crick discovered the structure of the DNA molecule, which became the key to understanding how all organisms pass genetic information onto their offspring. James Watson was only 23 years old at the time. Crick was older, but he hadn't even finished his PhD. They were working in a lab in Cambridge, England, where they didn't even have the right equipment to examine DNA. That equipment was located at King's College in London. Watson tried to get a job there by setting his sister up with one of the King's College scientists, but it didn't work out.
They were devastated when the world-renowned scientist Linus Pauling published a paper proposing a structure for DNA. But they immediately realized that his structure was wrong, and they vowed to beat him in the race to the answer. They learned that a woman named Rosalind Franklin was taking X-Ray pictures of DNA, and they decided that the only way to discover the structure was to look at those pictures.
Watson got to know Rosalind Franklin's lab partner, Maurice Wilkins, and one night he persuaded Wilkins to show him one of the X-ray pictures that Franklin had taken of a DNA molecule. On the train ride back to Cambridge, Watson sketched the picture on a newspaper. When he got back to his lab, he and Crick spent several days building theoretical models of the molecule. They hit on the correct structure on this day in 1953. Once they realized what they had accomplished, they went to the local bar to celebrate. Toasting their discovery, Watson shouted, "We have discovered the secret of life!" They would go on to win the Nobel Prize for their discovery. Rosalind Franklin would also have gotten credit, but she had died of cancer by the time the prize was awarded.
It's the birthday of the great essayist Michel de Montaigne, born in Perigueux, France (1533). His father was a wealthy landowner and a devout Catholic, with innovative ideas about child rearing. He sent the infant Michel off to live with peasant parents, so that he would learn to love the lower classes. Then, when Michel was a toddler, his father required everyone in the household to speak Latin rather than French, so that Latin would be his first language.
Michel went off to college and became a lawyer. His father died when Michel was 38 years old, and so he retired to the family estate and took over managing the property. More than anything, he loved to write letters, but after a few years in retirement, his best friend died and he suddenly had no one to write to. So he started writing letters to an imaginary reader, and those letters became an entirely new literary genre: the essay.

Pixies, Wilco, Modest Mouse, Set for Sasquatch!

The Pixies, Kanye West, Wilco and Modest Mouse lead the lineup for the Sasquatch! Music festival, to be held May 28 at the Gorge Amphitheatre in George, Wash. Other mainstage acts include the Arcade Fire, Ray LaMontagne, Jem, Bloc Party and U.S.E.
The Frames, Joanna Newsom, A.C. Newman, Matisyahu, Bobby Bare Jr., the Be Good Tanyas and the Benevento/Russo Duo will perform on the second stage, while acts with local ties such as Smoosh, Aqueduct, Visqueen and the Blue Scholars will hold court on the third stage.
Sasquatch! is the first confirmed show of 2005 for the Pixies, who staged a triumphant reunion tour last year after a 12-year hiatus. The quartet also plans on working in June and July, according to Marc Geiger, their agent at William Morris Agency.
"We're discussing some innovative ideas," Geiger tells Billboard.com. "We're looking at playing two shows in one night in the same market, with combination tickets. The first show would be a set of rare songs and B-sides, and the second would be the hits."
Geiger says the Pixies are also talking with other "like-minded" acts about playing some amphitheater shows in July, prior to a European run in late August.
Source billboard.com.

Bill Gates: US Secondary Schools are 'Obsolete'

Microsoft Corporation chairman Bill Gates says U.S. secondary schools are "obsolete," and he warns that American students are not being educated to effectively face growing competition in the global economy.
Featured as the keynote speaker at a meeting of U.S. governors about the state of the country's high schools, Mr. Gates said Saturday that the American secondary education system has not changed substantially in the past 50 years, when schools were designed to meet the needs of a different age.
The billionaire philanthropist has donated more than $700 million to reinvent American high schools through his charitable foundation the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation.
In a speech here in Washington, Mr. Gates said the United States ranks 16th out of 20 developed nations in the percentage of students who complete high school, and only 14th out of the top 20 in college graduation rates.
Some information for this report provided by AP.

Friday, February 25, 2005

Interesante

Uncle Sam Wants Tu
By
Max Boot
Los Angeles Times, February 24, 2005
It is hard to pick up a newspaper these days without reading about Army and Marine Corps recruiting and retention woes. Nonstop deployments and the danger faced by troops in Iraq are making it hard for both services to fill their ranks. The same goes for the National Guard and Reserves. (The Navy and Air Force, which are much less in harm's way, have no such difficulty.)
Just to stay at their present sizes, the Army and Marines are shoveling money into more advertising, extra recruiters and bigger enlistment bonuses. And yet it's clear to everyone (except, that is, President Bush and Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld) that the U.S. military is far too small to handle all the missions thrown its way. We need to not only maintain the current ranks but also to expand them in order to recover from a 1990s downsizing in which the Army lost 300,000 soldiers.
Some experts are already starting to wonder whether the war on terrorism might break the all-volunteer military. But because reinstating the draft isn't a serious option (the House defeated a symbolic draft bill last year, 402 to 2), some outside-the-box thinking is needed to fill up the ranks. In this regard, I note that there is a pretty big pool of manpower that's not being tapped: everyone on the planet who is not a U.S. citizen or permanent resident.
Since 9/11, Bush has expedited the naturalization process for soldiers. But to enlist, the Pentagon requires either proof of citizenship or a green card. Out of an active-duty force of about 1.4 million, only 108,803 are foreign-born (7%) and 30,541 are noncitizens (2%).
This is an anomaly by historical standards: In the 19th century, when the foreign-born population of the United States was much higher, so was the percentage of foreigners serving in the military. During the Civil War, at least 20% of Union soldiers were immigrants, and many of them had just stepped off the boat before donning a blue uniform. There were even entire units, like the 15th Wisconsin Volunteer Infantry (the Scandinavian Regiment) and Gen. Louis Blenker's German Division, where English was hardly spoken.
The military would do well today to open its ranks not only to legal immigrants but also to illegal ones and, as important, to untold numbers of young men and women who are not here now but would like to come. No doubt many would be willing to serve for some set period in return for one of the world's most precious commodities -- U.S. citizenship. Open up recruiting stations from Budapest to Bangkok, Cape Town to Cairo, Montreal to Mexico City. Some might deride those who sign up as mercenaries, but these troops would have significantly different motives than the usual soldier of fortune.
The simplest thing to do would be to sign up foreigners for the regular U.S. military, but it would also make sense to create a unit whose enlisted ranks would be composed entirely of non-Americans, led by U.S. officers and NCOs.
Call it the Freedom Legion. As its name implies, this unit would be modeled on the French Foreign Legion, except, again, U.S. citizenship would be part of the "pay." And rather than fighting for U.S. security writ small -- the way the Foreign Legion fights for the glory of France -- it would have as its mission defending and advancing freedom across the world. It would be, in effect, a multinational force under U.S. command -- but one that wouldn't require the permission of France, Germany or the United Nations to deploy.
The Freedom Legion would be the perfect unit to employ in places such as Darfur that are not critical security concerns but that cry out for more effective humanitarian intervention than any international organization could muster. U.S. politicians, so wary (and rightly so) of casualties among U.S. citizens, might take a more lenient attitude toward the employment of a force not made up of their constituents. An added benefit is that by recruiting foreigners, the U.S. military could address its most pressing strategic deficit in the war on terrorism -- lack of knowledge about other cultures. The most efficient way to expand the government's corps of Pashto or Arabic speakers isn't to send native-born Americans to language schools; it's to recruit native speakers of those languages.
Similar considerations early in the Cold War led Congress to pass the Lodge Act in 1950. This law allowed the Army Special Forces to recruit foreigners not living in the United States with the promise of citizenship after five years of service. More than 200 Eastern Europeans qualified as commandos before the Lodge Act expired in 1959. There's no reason why we couldn't recruit a fresh batch of foreigners today. It would certainly be easier than trying to sweet-talk more troops out of recalcitrant allies or, these days, recruiting at U.S. high schools.

"Aegis Ballistic Missile Defense is for real"



Raytheon Standard Missile-3 Intercepts Target in Aegis Ballistic Missile Defense System TestThursday February 24, 6:07 pm ET

PACIFIC MISSILE RANGE FACILITY, KAUAI, Hawaii, Feb. 24, 2005 /PRNewswire/ -- The Aegis Ballistic Missile Defense (BMD) Weapon System and Standard Missile-3 (SM-3) destroyed a ballistic missile outside the earth's atmosphere during an Aegis BMD Program flight test over the Pacific Ocean. Raytheon Company develops the SM-3. Lockheed Martin develops the Aegis BMD Weapon System.
The Feb. 24 mission -- the fifth successful intercept for SM-3 -- was the first firing of the Aegis BMD "Emergency Deployment" capability using operational versions of the SM-3 Block I missile and Aegis BMD Weapon System. This was also the first test to exercise SM-3's third stage rocket motor (TSRM) single-pulse mode. The TSRM has two pulses, which can be ignited independently, providing expansion of the ballistic missile engagement battlespace.
The SM-3 was launched from the Aegis BMD cruiser USS Lake Erie (CG 70) and hit a target missile that had been launched from the U.S. Navy's Pacific Missile Range Facility on Kauai, Hawaii.
"This successful flight test demonstrates the tactical, operational capability of SM-3 and the Aegis BMD Weapon System in real-world conditions," said Edward Miyashiro, Raytheon Missile Systems vice president, Naval Weapon Systems. "Successes like we've seen today provide decision makers the confidence to proceed with deploying in quantity, providing the Nation with a robust capability that will defend the U.S., deployed American forces, our friends and our allies. Aegis Ballistic Missile Defense is for real."

Brutal

Thompson 'shot himself on phone'

"The widow of US writer Hunter S Thompson has said her husband killed himself while they were speaking to one another on the telephone. Thompson - best-known for his 1972 account of a drug-addled Nevada trip, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas - shot himself on Sunday at his Colorado home. His widow, Anita Thompson, 32, told the Aspen Daily News she heard the "clicking of the gun". She said: "I was on the phone with him, he set the receiver down and did it." Anita Thompson, widow Mrs Thompson said her husband had asked her to come home from a health club so they could work on his weekly column, but instead of saying goodbye, he shot himself. She added that she heard a loud, muffled noise, but did not know what had happened.
"I was waiting for him to get back on the phone," she said.

Thompson, who was a leading political journalist and one of the most important US authors of the 20th century, was found dead by his son, Juan. The 67-year-old shot himself in the head in the kitchen while his son, daughter-in-law and six-year-old grandson were in the house.
Mrs Thompson told the newspaper her husband had repeatedly talked about killing himself in the months running up to his death. He had also left verbal and written instructions about what he wanted done with his body, his unpublished works and his assets. "He wanted to leave on top of his game. I wish I could have been more supportive of his decision," she added. "

>>
Jesus-on the phone with the wife, with a 6 year old in the house?

Thursday, February 24, 2005

Fight Club

JAN. 29 , 2005. Dozens of motorcycles are parked outside an aircraft hangar-size warehouse located in the postindustrial lowlands of West Oakland, in a zone the locals refer to as Ghost Town. There are gleaming, chopped-out Harleys, ancient Honda CB 400s, and a bevy of heavily modified, matte-black Japanese sport bikes. Few streetlights illuminate this particular block, and on this jet-black night the area is draped in a near tangible darkness. My tour guide, clad in a leather vest and a black Oakland A's cap, worn at an angle, meets me a few feet from the front door of the warehouse. He's a member of the East Bay Rats, the punkish clique of motorcycle freaks who are throwing tonight's shindig. His name is Alex. Tonight is fight night, an annual Rats event, and we are here to take in the spectacle of humans doing bad things to one another. We are gonna watch people get pummeled. Watch blood spew from their faces. Watch their poor little brains short-circuit as they get KO'd. This, in many ways, is the real-world equivalent of the movie Fight Club – subtract Meatloaf, Ed Norton, and Brad Pitt's hammy ass, and add in a real-life cast of hundreds of pugilism-loving spectators and a horde of brawlers, some skilled, some not so.

Yeah, I know: It's ugly. It's twisted. And yet, for some reason, I can't wait.

Prosecutor: 'There will be charges'


Associated Press
RAPID CITY, S.D.– A Valley City State basketball player will be charged with assault for throwing an elbow that gave a South Dakota School of Mines & Technology player a concussion and 14 stitches, a prosecutor says.
Investigators are still working on a report in the case, said Pennington County state's attorney Glenn Brenner said, and he will wait until it is finished before filing a charge of simple assault against Matt Klabo of Garrison, N.D.
Simple assault is a Class 1 misdemeanor with a maximum penalty of one year in jail and a $1,000 fine. The charge could be filed next week.
Brenner said he made up his mind after seeing videotape of the Friday night incident in a game between Tech and Valley City State of North Dakota.
"I've seen the tape. There will be charges. That's 100 percent," he said. "Unequivocally, there will be charges. I believe it indicates very clear assault."
Brenner said it will be the first time he has filed an assault charge from an athletic contest. The videotape will be the key piece of evidence, he said.
"We're fortunate in this particular case because a jury will be able to make an independent determination based on a videotape," Brenner said. "It's a luxury we don't have in other cases."
With about 11 minutes left in the Tech-Valley City State game, Klabo, a 6-foot-7 senior, hit 6-8 Tech senior Korey Kirschenmann in the face with his elbow. Kirschenmann fell to the floor and received a concussion and a gash below his left eye.
Initially, Tech officials said Kirschenmann received 27 stitches. On Wednesday, Coach Hugh Welsh told the Rapid City Journal the player actually had 14 stitches.
Klabo was tagged with a flagrant foul and was ejected

The Nuclear Family

Bringing it back to the lighter side of news...

At age 47, the Rolling Stones' bassist, Bill Wyman, began a relationship with 13-year old Mandy Smith, with her mother's blessing. Six years later, they were married, but the marriage only lasted a year. Not long after, Bill's 30-year-old son Stephen married Mandy's mother, age 46. That made Stephen a stepfather to his former stepmother. If Bill and Mandy had remained married, Stephen would have been his father's father-in-law and his own grandpa.

Hola Amigo

The Majorca (Spain) Daily Bulletin http://www.majorcadailybulletin.es/letters.dba?-1+7+0 carries an amusing letter on Prime Minister Jose Luis Rodriguez Zapatero's efforts to ingratiate himself with Bush:

"Ever since his election, Zapatero has spent much of his time shadowing Bush and attempting to shake his hand. On Wednesday, he was waiting in the shadows, and made his move when Bush was talking to Tony Blair. Bush, who I suspect didn't really know who Zapatero was said "hola amigo" and continued talking to Blair. Meanwhile, Zapatero walked off smiling away like a child with a new pair of shoes. The exchange was so brief Spanish newspapers had a nightmare trying to find a photograph of the "great meeting." To make matters worse a Spanish government spokesperson said that Bush and Zapatero had a "cordial exchange." (They forget to mention it lasted about two seconds.) Even more laughable was the "meeting" Spanish Foreign Secretary Moratinos had with U.S. Secretary of State Rice. He literally rushed over to her in a passageway and then later claimed he had a summit meeting."

Zapatero, of course, is the Socialist who famously backed John Kerry, then ignored Kerry's pleas not to withdraw Spanish troops from Iraq.

Achtung Baby

President Bush yesterday visited Germany, a country whose government and population have been markedly hostile to the Bush administration's pro-democracy foreign policy. But an article in Der Spiegel, far from a pro-Bush organ, runs against die Gezeiten. "Could George W. Bush Be Right?" asks the headline. It turns out that yes, he could:

"President Ronald Reagan's visit to Berlin in 1987 was, in many respects, very similar to President George W. Bush's visit to Mainz on Wednesday. . . . When Reagan stood before the Brandenburg Gate--and the Berlin Wall--and demanded that Gorbachev "tear down this Wall," he was lampooned the next day on the [German] editorial pages. He is a dreamer, wrote commentators. Realpolitik looks different.
But history has shown that it wasn't Reagan who was the dreamer as he voiced his demand. Rather, it was German politicians who were lacking in imagination--a group who in 1987 couldn't imagine that there might be an alternative to a divided Germany. Those who spoke of reunification were labelled as nationalists and the entire German left was completely uninterested in a unified Germany. . . .
Maybe history can repeat itself. Maybe the people of Syria, Iran or Jordan will get the idea in their heads to free themselves from their oppressive regimes just as the East Germans did. When the voter turnout in Iraq recently exceeded that of many Western nations, the chorus of critique from Iraq alarmists was, at least for a couple of days, quieted. Just as quiet as the chorus of Germany experts on the night of Nov. 9, 1989 when the Wall fell.
Just a thought for Old Europe to chew on: Bush might be right, just like Reagan was then."

Ukrainian politician wins a train car of cognac in a bet

Ukrainian deputy, Stepan Gavrish, stated that he was absolutely certain in the fact that the Ukrainian parliament would approve the need of the political reform in the country. That is why, Gavrish said, he decided to have a bet on a train car of cognac with another politician, whose name has not been exposed to the public. Stepan Gavrish won the bet: he is currently looking into the matter of regulating the question about receiving the prize from his unlucky colleague. "If I do not get my cognac, everyone will know this person's name. If I succeed, I will be ready to share the prize with journalists," the deputy said.

Putin wears a 60,000-dollar watch in comparison with George W.Bush's Timex for $50

A watch takes a distinctively special place among politicians' accessories. One may say that a watch is the only standard of luxury consumption. Real estate, yachts and jets are hidden from the public eye, as a rule. A watch is something that everybody can see every day. The Russian Newsweek conducted a research to find out which trademarks and models Russian oligarchs and politicians wear. It turned out as a result of the research that the Russian political, art and business elite prefer gold watches by best Swiss makers that count several centuries of experience. A watch underlines a high public status of its owner. Russian President Vladimir Putin wears most expensive watch among Russian politicians. The head of state wears a $60,000 Patek Philippe Perpetual Calendar watch. Putin wears his watch on the right wrist, the magazine wrote. The cost of Putin's watch is equal to the amount of the president's annual wages. The Russian president makes $60,000 a year. It looks like Putin is rather devoted to this watch brand. In 2003, Putin also had a Patek Philippe, although it was a different model - Patek Philippe Calatrava. Patek Philippe is a very conservative and expensive brand. Patek Philippe is a watch for rich presidents, presidents and politicians. It is noteworthy, that this brand does not like public advertising. An NTV correspondent decided to find out once if Putin was really wearing a Patek Philippe. "I have heard that the president has one of our watches. It is a rather strict model, although it is not the most complicated one," a spokesperson for the watchmaker said. Several Russian deputies and governmental officials also have a fondness for the presidential trademark. Anatoli Chubais, the chairman of the energy giant RAO UES of Russia wears a classic gold Patek Philippe complete with indicator of lunar phases and two additional calendar meters. Chubais wears his watch on the left wrist, though. President of Alpha Bank, Peter Aven, wears a bourgeois Patek Philippe Annual Calendar that comes in a white metal case. Aven's watch costs not less than $19,000. Moscow Mayor Yiri Luzhkov owns a Patek Philippe Calatrava for $18,000. A year ago the mayor had a gold watch with a portrait of Alexander Pushkin on the back lid. Luzhkov received the watch as a gift from the company Breguet for the 200th anniversary of the poet. Chelsea's owner, oligarch Roman Abramovich has a selection of Rolex watches. Now he wears a $29,000 Rolex Daytona, although he had a gold Rolex Oyster Perpetual Date Submariner for about $19,000 before. Mikhail Gorbachev wears Omega Constellation, Zhirinovsky owns a Soviet-made Slava watch. US President George W. Bush is a very modest person: he wears a 50-dollar Timex Indiglo watch. The American president is sure that he will never lose his watch: the presidential watch has a personal engraving on the back: George W. Bush President January 20, 2001. California governor and Hollywood star Arnold Schwarzenegger wears Audemars Piguet, models Royal Oak Offshore and Paneria Luminor. Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, who has a great passion for watches, wears the most expensive Constantin Vacheron watch for $540,000

Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Martin will reject missile defence: report

OTTAWA - Prime Minister Paul Martin will reject Canadian participation in the U.S. missile defence program. Martin plans to announce in the House of Commons as early as Thursday that the country will not partake fully in the controversial program. The news comes hours after Canada's next ambassador to the United States, Frank McKenna, set off a storm by saying Canada is already taking part in the program because it has agreed Norad can monitor the skies for incoming missiles. Martin's planned announcement will mark an abrupt change from his position 16 months ago during the Liberal leadership race, when he signaled that Canada should partake in missile defence. Since then, Martin has insisted that he hasn't reached a decision on whether Canada should be a full partner. And just two months ago, U.S. President George W. Bush pressed Martin publicly to sign on, saying on a visit to Halifax that he hoped the two countries would soon move forward to co-operate on ballistic missile defence.
But federal officials, who wished to remain anonymous, told the CBC's Radio-Canada that domestic considerations may have outweighed pressure from Washington.
Martin's government lost its majority last spring and the Bloc Québécois and the New Democrats oppose the plan, while the Conservatives support it but want a full debate on Canada's role. As well, Martin faces stiff resistance in his own caucus. The Liberals also want to improve their fortunes in Quebec, where there seems to be little support for missile defence.
Federal officials told the Canadian Press later on Tuesday that the United States was informed of Canada's decision at the NATO summit in Brussels. "[The Americans] were told we will not participate," a federal official, who asked to remain anonymous, told the agency. "It is a firm 'no.' I am not sure it is an indefinite 'no.'' " Earlier Tuesday, McKenna, a former New Brunswick premier, delivered an opposite message outside a meeting of the foreign affairs committee, which is examining his appointment as the next ambassador to the United States. McKenna invited to be Canada's ambassador to U.S. "I believe that we've given in large measure what the Americans want, which is the ability to use Norad and their intercept information in order to be able to target weaponry," he said. Canada agreed last August to allow Norad, the joint Canada-U.S. air defence command, to share information it gathers with the people running the U.S. missile defence program.

They have earned it.

CRUE CLEANING UP ITS ACT
MOTLEY Crue's dishy tell-all, "The Dirt," established them as one of the most debauched rock bands of all time — but you wouldn't know it from the boring backstage scene at their concert in Fort Lauderdale, Fla., the other night. The kick-off show of the glam-rock gods' "Red, White & Cure Tour 2005 . . . Better Live Than Dead" was notable for a distinct lack of sex and drugs. Singer Vince Neil's tweezer-addicted new wife, Lia, was watching him like a hawk, and bassist Nikki Sixx, who's married to bimbonic Donna D'Errico, refused to let groupies into his dressing room. Pasty-faced guitarist Mick Mars, who looks downright cadaverous, was lucky to make it through the concert without falling over. "He looks like death," says our tipster. "I'm surprised he can even stand up during their long show." The only Crue member who looked like he was having any fun was drummer Tommy Lee, who allowed a legion of skanky lovelies into his dressing room. "It was pretty boring backstage," summed up our spy. "The band is older, been through rehab, and you could barely find a beer — definitely not a drug bacchanalia."

Report: Vikings agree to trade Moss to Raiders

Associated Press Posted: 2 minutes ago
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Randy Moss is heading for Oakland, the receiver's agent said Wednesday.
Dante DiTrapano, Moss' agent, told The Associated Press that the Minnesota Vikings and the Raiders had "come to an agreement on Randy playing for Oakland next year."
The Vikings wouldn't confirm a deal.
"We have been in discussions with the Oakland Raiders, but there's nothing to announce," Rob Brzezinski, the team's vice president of football operations, told The Associated Press.
DiTrapano said he didn't know the terms of the deal, but The St. Paul Pioneer Press reported the Vikings would get linebacker Napoleon Harris, along with the seventh overall pick and a late-round pick in the upcoming draft.
The deal cannot become official until March 2, the start of the NFL's fiscal year.
The flamboyant Moss had been the subject of trade rumors following this past season. He struggled with a hamstring injury and was fined $10,000 for pretending to pull down his pants and moon the Green Bay crowd during Minnesota's playoff win. He also drew criticism for leaving the field with 2 seconds left in a regular-season loss against Washington.
On Tuesday, the Raiders re-signed Jerry Porter, their star wide receiver to a contract worth $20 million over five years. Porter could have become a free agent on March 2.

Bush, Schroeder Oppose Iran's Nuclear Ambitions

Two Leaders Brush Aside Past Differences on Iraq Invasion
By William BraniginWashington Post Staff WriterWednesday, February 23, 2005; 1:12 PM
President Bush and German Chancellor Gerhard Schroeder said today the United States and Europe are united in their opposition to Iranian development of nuclear weapons, and Bush called on Iran's government to heed the democratic aspirations of its people.
In a press conference in Mainz, Germany, on the fourth day of Bush's trip to Europe, the two leaders pushed aside their past disagreements over the invasion of Iraq and stated that they share the goal of establishing a stable democracy there.

They also agreed that Syria should withdraw its troops from Lebanon and called for an international investigation of the killing of former Lebanese prime minister Rafiq Hariri, who died when a powerful bomb blew up his motorcade in Beirut last week.
Bush said he and Schroeder had discussed Iran in a meeting that preceded the press conference, and he thanked Germany, Britain and France for "taking the lead" in trying to persuade Iranian leaders to give up any nuclear weapons ambitions and live up to the Non-Proliferation Treaty.
"It's vital that the Iranians hear the world speak with one voice that they shouldn't have a nuclear weapon," Bush said at the Electoral Palace in Mainz. He noted his remark yesterday that "all options are on the table," but added, "I also reminded people that diplomacy is just beginning. Iran is not Iraq. We've just started the diplomatic efforts, and I want to thank our friends for taking the lead and I will -- we will work with them to convince the mullahs that they need to give up their nuclear ambitions."
In Tehran, Iranian officials today reiterated their denials of any plans to produce nuclear weapons, but they insisted that Iran has the right to pursue nuclear technology, including uranium enrichment.
President Mohammad Khatami said after a cabinet meeting that "the Europeans would suffer more than Iran" if they succumbed to U.S. pressures and took action against his country, the state-run Islamic Republic News Agency reported. It did not elaborate.
The agency also quoted Foreign Minister Kamal Kharrazi as saying Iran was determined to continue its uranium enrichment program, which he said was temporarily suspended under an agreement with Germany, France and Britain, acting on behalf of the European Union. Kharrazi insisted that "Iran's nuclear activities are peaceful," the news agency said, and he called on the Europeans to make "serious strides toward transfer of technology, investment and Iran's security."

Looking for a good book?

"Nowhere is this plainer than in the pages of The Subject Steve, a novel about a man diagnosed with a deadly disease with no cause, no symptoms, and no cure. (Sharp-eyed detox nurses and rehab trustees would be well advised to ban this novel from the premises.) The source of Steve’s affliction might be drugs, or sex, or religion or a combination of all three. Consider this rumination on Steve’s love interest at the Center for Nondenominational Recovery and Redemption:

“It was organized religion that stole my baby’s legs away. Some soused bishop jumped a curbside in his El Camino. This was in her hometown in Neptune, New Jersey. [Ed. Note: On Venus Drive, perhaps?] Renee was just seventeen, window-shopping for a slutty top for school. She spent a year in bed and a few more trying to be a miracle of physical therapy, dreamed of the day she’d stagger through a cheering gauntlet of male nurse beefcake, but she never got past the cold flops on the padded floor. She took to gin, launched a newsletter called Gimp Snatch. Heinrich [the center’s founder] found her doing wheelchair donuts in the parking lot of Arman’s Adult Motel. He told her he was trolling for souls. She said she’d blow him for a ride home.”

What are the lessons that can be learned from this worldview? It amounts to nothing more and nothing less than this: You see an El Camino coming at you, get the hell out of the way. Are we supposed to admire those who got out of the way, pity those who don’t? Of course not. Leave it to a man with an advertising background to take the visual clichés and received knowledge passed down from after-school special and give them a thorough cornholing. This is why admiring Lipsyte’s characters is like admiring the bravura of a crack addict as he leaps from the window of a burning building. It’s a terrible thing. A tragedy for the families. All that. But Lipsyte understands that what we really want to know is this: “Did the asshole start the fire?” "

Tuesday, February 22, 2005

What I Learned Today

A Fly urinates every 4.5 minutes.

Pope's new book-

"In another section, the Pope describes at length the assassination attempt on May 13, 1981, when Turkish gunman Mehmet Ali Agca shot and nearly killed him in St Peter's Square.
Of Agca, the Pope writes the assassination attempt was "not his initiative, someone else masterminded it and someone else commissioned it."

Two trials in the early 1980s failed to prove prosecutors' suspicions that Bulgaria's secret services had masterminded a plot to kill the Pope on behalf of the Soviet Union.
At the time the Polish Pope was a strong supporter of the Solidarity trade union in his native Poland and the Soviet Union saw Solidarity as a threat to the stability of the communist bloc.
The Pope says the assassination attempt against him was perhaps "the last convulsion" of the ideologies of the 20th century -- a clear reference to the Communist bloc. "

Lebanon/Syria

A good link to a CFR primer on Lebanon/Syria:

Updated: February 18, 2005
What is Syria’s role in Lebanon?
It dominates Lebanon’s foreign policy and has effectively occupied large sections of its smaller neighbor for nearly 30 years. There are currently some 15,000 Syrian troops in Lebanon, and Hezbollah —a militant Shiite group supported by Syria and Iran—has long operated in southern Lebanon. The United States has repeatedly demanded that Syria withdraw its troops and refrain from interfering in Lebanese politics.
Was Syria responsible for the assassination of Rafik Hariri?
There are many suspicions that it was, but no proof. On February 14, a massive car bomb in Beirut killed Hariri and more than a dozen others and wounded more than 100. Syrian officials deny involvement. In September 2004, the Baathist government of Syrian President Bashar al-Assad pressured Lebanon’s parliament to amend the constitution and extend the presidential term of Emile Lahoud, a Maronite Christian widely seen as a Syrian puppet. Then-Prime Minister Hariri, a billionaire businessman who had led the post-civil war rebuilding of Lebanon, resigned in protest in October.
How long have Syrian troops been in Lebanon?
Since 1976. Full-scale civil war broke out in April 1975 between the Maronite Christian groups of the Lebanese Front and the Lebanese National Movement, which was made up of left-leaning Muslims who wanted a greater share of political power. Fighting was intense, and in June 1976 the Maronite-dominated government asked for support from Syria.

Happy Birthday GW

Today is the anniversary of the birth of George Washington. Of all the great men of the revolutionary era to whom we owe our freedom, Washington's greatness was the rarest, the most necessary, and, at this remove in time, the hardest to understand.

Take, for example, Washington's contribution to the Constitutional Convention of 1787. Washington's mere presence lent the undertaking and its handiwork the legitimacy that resulted in success. The convention's first order of business was the election of a presiding officer. Washington was of course the delegates' unanimous choice.

Presiding over the convention over that fateful summer, Washington said virtually nothing. In his wonderful book on Washington, Richard Brookhiser notes: "The esteem in which Washinton was held affected his fellow delegates first of all...Washington did not wield the power he possessed by speaking. Apart from his lecture on secrecy, Washington did not address the Convention between the first day and the last."

The esteem in which he was held by his fellow citizens was similarly crucial to the implementation of the Constitution during his presidency. In 1790 Rhode Island became the thirteenth state to ratify the Constitution and complete the Union. To mark the occasion, President Washington made a ceremonial visit to Newport when Congress recessed in August. Newport welcomed Washington with open arms. In Newport on August 18, according to James Thomas Flexner, Washington "completely fatigued the company" by briskly walking, fortified by the wine and punch served in four different houses along his route, from nine in the morning until one in the afternoon.

In anticipation of Washington's visit to Newport, the members of America's oldest Jewish congregation prepared a letter welcoming Washington for presentation to him at a public event on the morning of August 18. The letter was authorized by the congregation's board and signed by its president, Moses Seixas. It is Washington's magnificent letter responding to Seixas's that is known as a testament to religious freedom and that has become famous as one of the classic statements of religious toleration in America.

The congregation's letter to Washington is not so well known. Ironically, however, the most famous line in Washington's letter is an echo of the congregation's letter to Washington. By far the most striking feature of the congregation's letter is its expression of sheer gratitude both to Washington himself and for the religious freedom afforded by the country in whose founding he had proved instrumental. Here is the congregation's letter:

Permit the children of the stock of Abraham to approach you with the most cordial affection and esteem for your person and merits ~~ and to join with our fellow citizens in welcoming you to NewPort.

With pleasure we reflect on those days ~~ those days of difficulty, and danger, when the God of Israel, who delivered David from the peril of the sword, ~~ shielded Your head in the day of battle: ~~ and we rejoice to think, that the same Spirit, who rested in the Bosom of the greatly beloved Daniel enabling him to preside over the Provinces of the Babylonish Empire, rests and ever will rest, upon you, enabling you to discharge the arduous duties of Chief Magistrate in these States.

Deprived as we heretofore have been of the invaluable rights of free Citizens, we now with a deep sense of gratitude to the Almighty disposer of all events behold a Government, erected by the Majesty of the People ~~ a Government, which to bigotry gives no sanction, to persecution no assistance ~~ but generously affording to all Liberty of conscience, and immunities of Citizenship: ~~

deeming every one, of whatever Nation, tongue, or language equal parts of the great governmental Machine: ~~ This so ample and extensive Federal Union whose basis is Philanthropy, Mutual confidence and Public Virtue, we cannot but acknowledge to be the work of the Great God, who ruleth in the Armies of Heaven, and among the Inhabitants of the Earth, doing whatever seemeth him good.

For all these Blessings of civil and religious liberty which we enjoy under an equal benign administration, we desire to send up our thanks to the Ancient of Days, the great preserver of Men ~~beseeching him, that the Angel who conducted our forefathers through the wilderness into the promised Land, may graciously conduct you through all the difficulties and dangers of this mortal life: ~~ And, when, like Joshua full of days and full of honour, you are gathered to your Fathers, may you be admitted into the Heavenly Paradise to partake of the water of life, and the tree of immortality.

Done and Signed by order of the Hebrew Congregation in NewPort, Rhode Island August 17th 1790.
Moses Seixas, Warden


Today, as we fight the contemporary adherents of "the Babylonish empire," let us send up our thanks to the Ancient of Days for this indispensable man.

Borat

In my country there is problem
And that problem is transport
It take very very long, Because Kazakhstan is big
Throw transport down the well
So my country can be free
We must make travel easy
Then we’ll have a big party

In my country there is problem
And that problem is the Jew
They take everybody money
And they never give it back
Throw the jew down the well
So my country can be free

You must grab him by his horns
Then we have a big party
If you see the Jew coming
You must be carefull of his teeth
You must grab him by his money
And I tell you what to do

Monday, February 21, 2005

Eat Chicken

Avian Flu World's No. 1 Threat, CDC Head Says
Email this StoryFeb 21, 2:07 PM (ET)

By Maggie Fox, Health and Science Correspondent

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Avian flu poses the single biggest threat to the world right now and health officials may not yet have all the tools they need to fight it, the head of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said on Monday. Vaccine efforts are still focused on garden-variety influenza, which kills 36,000 Americans every year, and it would be impossible, in case of an avian flu epidemic, to switch gears quickly to make a special avian flu vaccine, CDC Director Dr. Julie Gerberding said. "This is a very ominous situation for the globe," Gerberding told a meeting of the American Association for the Advancement of Science, calling it the "most important threat that we are facing right now." "I think we can all recognize a similar pattern probably occurred prior to 1918," she said, referring to the 1918 pandemic of influenza, which also passed from birds to people and killed between 20 million and 40 million people globally. The H5N1 avian flu, which first appeared in Hong Kong in 1997 and has since popped up twice, is evolving and can jump directly from birds to people, killing an estimated 72 percent of diagnosed victims, Gerberding said. Officials have documented 45 deaths so far from avian flu. Gerberding said influenza was far more infectious than severe acute respiratory syndrome or SARS, which swept out of China in 2003, killing 800 people and causing global concern before it was stopped. Health experts have also pointed out influenza kills much faster than diseases such as AIDS, taking tens of millions of lives in the space of weeks or months.

Europe/US relations

A great new Mark Steyn piece at the Telegraph: What’s US policy on Europe? No giggling.

Two years ago, I wrote that America and Europe were now engaged in a new Cold War. And just like the old Cold War it’s not only about Jacques Chirac issuing Krushchevian boasts to Washington that “we will bury you”; it’s also got room for the occasional détente phase. So this month in Washington is Be Nice To Europe month. For weeks now, the Administration’s hardline Zionist Christian fundamentalist neocon unilateralist warmongers have been coming into the office to find smiley-face reminders from the White House pinned to the desk: “Have you hugged a European foreign minister today?” And they’ve been doing their best to comply: Condi Rice flew in to the heart of “old Europe” and launched a big charm offensive. Then Donald Rumsfeld flew in and launched what felt like a faintly parodic charm offensive, insisting that the disparaging remarks about “old Europe” had been made by the “old Rumsfeld”. And now the President himself is on his way, staying up all night on Air Force One trying to master the official State Department briefing paper on the European Rapid Reaction Force, the European Constitution, the European negotiations with Iran, etc. (“When these subjects come up, US policy is to nod politely and try not to giggle. If you feel a massive hoot of derision coming on, duck out to the men’s room, but without blaming it on the escargots.”) The French Foreign Minister took to calling the US Secretary of State “chère Condi” every 30 seconds. It’s doubtful if the French President will go that far, but, if he does, the White House line is that Mr Bush is happy to play Renee Zellweger to Chirac’s Tom Cruise (“You had me at bonjour”). What does all this mean? Nothing.

You know you want to read the rest.

RU-21 Red

Russian scientists have developed a product that can keep a person drunk, Britain’s Daily Telegraph wrote.The tablet called RU-21 Red was developed in Spirit Sciences, a laboratory based in California but with research facilities in Russia. The same scientists had earlier worked on secret programs for the Kremlin and had made the famous RU-21 product that cures hangovers.
If you take a tablet you need less alcohol to stay drunk, the scientists were quoted by the paper as saying. “RU-21 Red prolongs drunkenness and enhances intoxication,” the company co-founder, Emil Chiabery, born in the ex-Soviet republic of Georgia said.

Everything You Get in Life is Because Bono Doesn't Want It

by Charlie Amter Feb 18, 2005, 4:35 PM PT
So this is what happens when you title an album How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb.
U2's Bono, whose trophy case is packed with Grammys and even a Golden Globe, is up for another award that may render all the rest quaint: the Nobel Peace Prize.
The rocker, who in his spare time champions Third World debt relief, AIDS awareness and increased action in Sudan's troubled Darfur region, is one of the 166 nominees for this year's honor.
The Irish-born singer, last seen at Sunday's Grammy Awards collecting two statuettes and participating in the all-star version of "Across the Universe" benefiting tsunami victims, regularly travels around the world meeting with diplomats and heads of state to push his pet causes.
"I believe a fundamental human right is the ability to start again, to break free from the sins of the father," Bono told reporters on a 2002 trip to Africa with former U.S. Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill, in which he crusaded for debt forgiveness

The Fear

Writer Hunter S. Thompson Kills Himself
By ROBERT WELLERAssociated Press Writer

ASPEN, Colo. (AP) -- Hunter S. Thompson, the hard-living writer who inserted himself into his accounts of America's underbelly and popularized a first-person form of journalism in books such as "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas," has committed suicide.
Thompson was found dead Sunday in his Aspen-area home of an apparent self-inflicted gunshot wound, sheriff's officials said. He was 67. Thompson's wife, Anita, had gone out before the shooting and was not home at the time. His son, Juan, found the body.

Friday, February 18, 2005

Equatorial Guinea questions Thatcher over coup

Sir Mark Thatcher today faced questions from Equatorial Guinean prosecutors over a coup attempt in the country.
Thatcher, who last month pleaded guilty to violating South Africa's anti-mercenary laws, arrived at a Cape Town court to hear the list of questions from the oil-rich West African nation.
A spokesman for the South African justice ministry said the court questioning had come about because of a mutual judicial aid agreement between the two countries.
"I'm very relaxed, I'm looking forward to it," Thatcher said as he arrived at Wynberg magistrate's court with his lawyer.
President Teodoro Obiang Nguema of Equatorial Guinea accuses Thatcher and other, mostly British, financiers of funding a plot to install an opposition figure as a puppet leader.
Thatcher admitted financing a helicopter in return for a four-year suspended sentence and a three million rand (£266,000) fine.
He initially contested the court order requiring that he answer Equatorial Guinea's questions. But he dropped the challenge following the plea bargain, which allowed him to leave South Africa to join his mother, the former prime minister, in Britain.
Thatcher has said that he hopes to join his wife and two children in the US soon, but returned to South Africa for today's appearance.
South African intelligence services exposed the alleged plot in March, and accused mercenaries were arrested in Equatorial Guinea and Zimbabwe.

Barber's Pole

THE most lurid testimony to be heard in Michael Jackson's looming child molestation trial could concern the bizarre appearance of his penis. Private investigator Ernie Rizzo, who was hired by the family of the boy who accused Jackson of molestation in 1993, predicts that Jackson's latest alleged victim could provide damning testimony about the pop oddball's uniquely marked manhood. Rizzo, a former Chicago police detective who has seen photographs of Jackson's genitals taken by cops in 1993, claims that because Jackson "bleaches" his body twice a week, distinctive markings on his penis are visible when he is aroused. "It looks like a barber's pole," Rizzo tells PAGE SIX. "That's exactly what it looks like. The first kid and all the other kids who have seen his penis know that there are brown circles around it. "If the second kid is allowed to testify, this will come into question," Rizzo predicts. "Jackson doesn't have [the skin-whitening disease] vitiligo. Debbie Rowe got him the bleach — she used to work for the dermatologist . . . There has never been any dermatologist who has come forward on his behalf to say he has vitiligo." The 1993 case Rizzo investigated never went to trial because the boy's family accepted a multimillion dollar settlement from Jackson and stopped cooperating with prosecutors. Since Jackson's arrest for the current molestation charge in 2003, Rizzo, who claims that people working for the superstar have bugged his car in the past, has been outspoken in his belief that Jackson is "King of Pedophiles." The limelight-loving P.I. even asked prosecutors not to subpoena him to testify at the trial, because he wants to be free to blast Jackson in the media. "They contacted me, and I told them I'm more than happy to testify," Rizzo says. "But I don't want a subpoena, because once you get that, you gotta stop talking." Jackson's long-suffering spokeswoman, Raymone Bain, did not respond to detailed requests for comment.

Jimtavis? Star? WTF?

A dispute over a $20 cab fare -- and an offer to pay it with marijuana -- leads to multiple charges against the players

Friday, February 18, 2005 PAUL BUKER

What started as a dispute with a taxi driver over a $20 fare escalated into a scuffle in the wee hours Friday morning in Corvallis and led to the arrests of two Oregon State football players.
Jimtavis Walker, a transfer from Florida who was expected to be the Beavers' starting tailback in the fall, and Star Paddock, a walk-on deep snapper, were arrested at 5:10 a.m. at the apartment of two other OSU players, wide receivers Kevin Swanigan and Marcel Love. Walker and Paddock were charged with robbery in the third degree, theft of services, harassment, assault in the fourth degree and attempted delivery of a controlled substance. Seven OSU football players have been involved in incidents since Nov. 12, when four players engaged in a confrontation with an Oregon Army National Guardsman at the Headline Cafe: defensive end Joe Rudulph, wide receiver Anthony Wheat-Brown, offensive lineman Whitfield Usher and defensive tackle Ryan Rainwater. Less than two weeks later, -backup center Brent Bridges was involved in an alleged assault, also at the Headline Cafe. Capt. Jon Sassaman of the Corvallis Police Department said Walker and Paddock were taken to the Benton County Correctional Facility, where they were booked and released. "Bottom line, these guys didn't pay for a taxi ride and it sort of got out of hand," Sassaman said. According to the police report, the incident occurred at 2:52 a.m. The taxi driver, an OSU student who declined to give his name because he said he feared for his safety, said Walker offered him marijuana as payment for the cab ride after the players initially tried to give him food as payment. The cab driver said Walker had what appeared to be "a sandwich bag full of pot." "It was obvious they had been drinking, and they were quite unruly," the driver said, adding that Walker threw a hamburger at him after the players left the cab. The driver said that after Walker berated him, Walker "lit up a joint." The driver said Paddock pushed him and slammed the door of the cab on his knee. He said he had a bruised right shoulder and a scar on his knee from the incident. He said the players also took his clipboard, which contained approximately $52 in charge slips from previous fares, plus his itinerary and other information. Sassaman said officers did not find marijuana on Walker or Paddock when they were arrested at an apartment complex at 900 S.E. Centerpointe Dr. in Corvallis. However, the officers did find "flakes or residue" around the toilet of the apartment. OSU coach Mike Riley said both players would be held out of team activities pending further investigation. "I'm disappointed that this has happened but I cannot comment further because of the ongoing investigation,"he said in a statement released by the school Thursday. According to the OSU release, both players also will be subject to an investigation by the university's student conduct committee. The four players involved in the first incident remain suspended.

Thursday, February 17, 2005

Who gonna Sex Dikembe Tonight?

Do you guys remember the GU story about Dikembe? Turns out it's all over the web and on the Jim Rome show too!

Dikembe Mutombo propositioning women at Georgetown by asking "Who wants to sex Mutombo?

One of Jim Rome's regular callers also mentions it often.

I said it a work today and a guy next to me said he hears it on Rome all the time.

Isaac Brock Interview

O: Was licensing your songs to commercials a tough decision?

IB: Figuring out ways to pay the rent isn't really a tough decision. Around the time we did the beer commercial and the shoe commercial, I thought, "Am I compromising my music by doing this?" And I think not. I like keeping the lights on in my house. People who don't have to make their living playing music can bitch about my principles while they spend their parents' money or wash dishes for some asshole. Principles are something that people are a lot better at checking in other people than keeping their own. My rationale behind the beer commercial was, "I like drinking MGD! I like beer probably more than I should, probably more than is healthy." I was hoping I could get a lifetime supply out of the deal, but I guess I'll have to buy it with that big ol' check. [Laughs.]


Funny Stuff

On this day

Literary and Historical Notes:
It's the birthday of novelist Chaim Potok, born in the Bronx, New York City (1929). When he told his mother he wanted to become a writer, she responded, "You want to write stories? That's very nice. You be a brain surgeon, and on the side you write stories." His novel The Chosen (1967) won the Pulitzer Prize.
It's the birthday of the Australian journalist and poet Andrew Barton Paterson (1864). He was a World War I correspondent and the author of several books of light verse, including The Animals Noah Forgot (1933). He's best known for "Waltzing Matilda," adapted from a traditional verse, which became Australia's national song.
It's the birthday of poet/rocker/stuntman Christopher Galen Haberman. Born Portland, Oregon 1973. Best known for his angry poetry and large collection of 70's pornography. As a teenager he aspired to a career in professional wrestling, after suffering a severe and chronic drug reaction, he decided upon art as his creative avenue. He reached a cult following in the 90's for his willingness to shave his head and wear a jock-strap in public. He is currently in seclusion working on his opus/onus.
It's the birthday of Irish-American editor and publisher S. S. McClure, born in County Antrim, Ireland (1857). He organized the first syndicated newspaper in the United States, the 'McClure Syndicate' (1884), and later founded McClure's magazine (1893), the most controversial muckraking journal of its time.
It's the birthday of entrepreneur Montgomery Ward, born in Chatham, New Jersey (1844), who came up with the mail-order system of merchandising. As a young man he sold goods to farmers who grumbled about the mark-up costs. This experience prompted his idea of ordering goods direct, by mail: customers could buy lower-cost items direct from the warehouse through catalogue orders they sent in from home. He issued his first catalogue in 1872-a single sheet of paper offering 150 items.
It's the birthday of René Laennec, born in Quimper, near Brittany (1781). He's called the "father of thoracic medicine" for having invented the stethoscope.
It's the birthday of Thomas Malthus, born in The Rookery, near Dorking, England (1766), author of the Essay on Principle of Population. Malthus was pessimistic about the future because of the natural tendency of the population to increase faster than the means of subsistence.
Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.®

Maracas

Holy crapholi, I nearly whizzed myself laffing at work when I read this snippet from this linked article in the Guardian (RP is Richard Pryor)

Jason Byrne: You talk about Muhammad Ali in your latest DVD and how frightening it was to be in the ring with him. But do you reckon you could beat him now that the two of you shake like maracas?

RP: That's your fuckin' question?

A new spymaster—and a powerful one

President Bush has chosen John Negroponte, currently ambassador to Iraq, as America’s first director of national intelligence. The choice of Mr Negroponte indicates that the newly created job will have real power

JOHN NEGROPONTE is tough. There can be no doubt that the man George Bush has chosen as America's first director of national intelligence is a survivor and a fighter. Mr Negroponte, whose nomination was announced by Mr Bush on Thursday February 17th, has been accused of abetting torture and murder in Central America during the 1980s. He was ambassador to the United Nations during the run-up to the Iraq war and is currently America’s ambassador to a violence-torn Iraq. To many he is a tarnished figure—but his critics have been able only to watch him rise through the ranks from one hard job to another.
He will need to draw on all his experience of fighting—both the diplomatic and the literal sort—for his hardest job yet. Legislation passed in December created the post. America’s 15 intelligence agencies were seen as competing rather than co-operating, and the special commission that investigated the September 11th 2001 attacks determined that better coordination might have been able to forestall the tragedy. Congress, under pressure from the commission and the September 11th victims’ families, duly created the powerful post of the DNI.

The Left and War

Writing in New York magazine, Kurt Andersen confronts the "major intellectual-moral-political problem" the successful Iraqi elections pose for New York liberals:

"Liberal guilt" once meant feeling discomfort over one's good fortune in an unjust world. As this last U.S. election cycle began, however, a new subspecies of liberal guilt arose--over the pleasure liberals took in bad news from Iraq, which seemed sure to hurt the administration. But with Bush reelected, any shred of tacit moral rationale is gone. In other words, feel the guilt, and let it be a pang that leads to moral clarity.

Each of us has a Hobbesian choice concerning Iraq; either we hope for the vindication of Bush's risky, very possibly reckless policy, or we are in a de facto alliance with the killers of American soldiers and Iraqi civilians. We can be angry with Bush for bringing us to this nasty ethical crossroads, but here we are nonetheless"


Andersen's piece is a remarkably blunt assessment of his fellow liberals' attitudes toward Iraq--and toward Vietnam:

At a certain point during the Vietnam War, a majority of Americans--those of us who were in favor of unilateral U.S. withdrawal--were in a de facto alliance with the North Vietnamese, the Vietcong, and the Soviets. Unpleasant but true. . . .

With liberals, Vietnam redux is all too conscious: It is irresistible to them (and to almost anyone over 40) to fit the war in Iraq into the template of Indochina, even if the parallels are only superficial. This Groundhog Day, as we all looked forward to watching a Beatle perform on TV (and on a Sunday evening in early February, just like in 1964), a fiftyish antiwar friend of mine in Park Slope dismissed the election in Iraq as "just like the election in Vietnam in 1967."

I didn't know what she meant, because I had not yet read the posting by Kos, the lefty star Markos Moulitsas's nom de blog, of a certain Times clip from 1967--about how "United States officials were surprised and heartened . . . at the size of turnout in South Vietnam's presidential election despite a Vietcong terrorist campaign to disrupt the voting." Kos commented, "January was the third bloodiest month for U.S. and allied troops. Will that cease now that Iraqis have voted? Nope . . . The war will continue unabated." One senses a wish for further war. One of Kos's regulars then wrote, "I hope I'm wrong on this," and my disingenuousness alarm went off. When people are deeply invested in any set of analyses and predictions, do they ever sincerely hope they're wrong?


The lesson the left learned from Vietnam is that it is acceptable to root against America during wartime. Will others follow Andersen's lead and begin unlearning it?

Roadtrip Beeatches

4 NIGHTS IN SEATTLE

107.7 The End, KEXP 90.3/91.7 FM and The Stranger present four nights with MODEST MOUSE and special guests. Tuesday through Friday, March 8th, 9th, 10th and 11th at The Showbox in Seattle, WA.Tuesday and Wednesday: Doors at 7pm, All Ages. Thursday and Friday: Doors at 8pm, 21+. Each show $25.25 advance and day of show at TicketsWest and all outlets, or $91.00 for a four night pass available at The Showbox, the Capitol Hill Sonic Boom and the Queen Anne Easy Street Records only. A portion of proceeds to benefit the Great Ape Project (www.greatapeproject.org) and "Here It Comes". Tickets on sale this Saturday, February 5, at 10am!

Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Tuvalu/Kyoto

"Islanders on tiny Tuvalu in the South Pacific last week saw the future of global warming and rising sea levels, as extreme high tides caused waves to crash over crumbling sea-walls and flood their homes," Reuters reports:

"Our island is sinking together with our hearts," wrote Silafaga Lalua in Tuvalu News. . . .
Tuvalu is a remote island nation consisting of a fringe of atolls covering just 10 sq miles, with the highest point no more than 17 ft above sea level, but most a mere 6.5 ft.
Global warming from greenhouse gas pollution is regarded as the main reason for higher sea levels, now rising about 2mm (0.08 in) a year, which could swamp low-lying nations such as Tuvalu and the Maldives in the Indian Ocean if temperatures keep rising."


For the sake of argument, let's assume this "global warming" stuff is true. If the sea continues rising at 0.08 inch a year, that means Tuvalu will be mostly submerged in 975 years, and will disappear entirely in 2,550 years. So in the year 4555 we can expect to read headlines like: "Tuvalu Disappears, Bush to Blame."

Panhandlers

Wilamette Week has a interesting story about Portland's Panhandleing problem-

"You might think the reason a particular individual flies a sign at a particular intersection at any given moment is governed by chance. In fact, flagging is anything but random. It is a profession with its own rules and hierarchies. Ninety flaggers, each earning $35 a day, pencils out to more than $1 million a year. Chickenfeed by your standards, maybe, but it's enough money to spawn careers, cartels, competition—and enforcers.
A good location is the flagger's stock in trade. Choosing well means the difference between earfuls of insults and immediate, untaxed cash. One of the better spots in Portland is the grimy curb at the foot of the Banfield Freeway's 43rd Avenue off-ramp, which is controlled—or shared, if you prefer—by a small cartel."

Ed Wangler signs with Knights/AF2

Courtesy: Macon Knights

Knights Pick Up Three from Major DI Programs Along with Former Fort Valley State Player

MACON, Ga. – The Macon Knights announced today the assignment of Matt Jackson, Rashad Chisholm, Larry Casher and Ed Wangler. This addition brings the Knights training camp roster to 25 players with a month left before the team goes to camp.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

SDI/Reagan Test Site

Interceptor fails to hit target for second time in three months
By Janene Scully
For the second time in three months, an attempt to shoot down a mock warhead flopped when the interceptor weapon failed to fly from the central Pacific Ocean launch site.
Officials said a target weapon with the dummy warhead successfully launched from Kodiak, Alaska, Sunday night. But the weapon set to ferry the "kill vehicle" didn't take off as scheduled from the Kwajalein Missile Range. "We don't know what happened this time, but preliminary indications are it was a fault with the ground-support equipment," said Chris Taylor, spokesman for the Missile Defense Agency. He stopped short of called the test a failure. "We consider it unable to complete the test," he said. The test snafu is similar to an incomplete intercept attempt in mid-December. In that mission, a target launched from Alaska, but the intercept didn't occur when the missile carrying the "kill vehicle" failed to blastoff. Officials blamed a glitch in communication equipment. Under the schedule, the next missile defense test set for spring was suppose to involve a target launched from Vandenberg and an interceptor that would blast off from Kwajalein. Before the Dec. 15 launch, it had been two years since a test. The program had gone 5-for-8 in previous attempts to intercept a target. Taylor said he didn't know if MDA leaders will instead try to re-do Sunday's test. It is unclear how continued test failures would affect two experimental interceptor bases in Alaska and California. Those two bases, Fort Greely, Alaska, and Vandenberg, are positioned to oppose the threat of attack from North Korea. Both are still classified as experimental but, officials say, they could fire interceptors in an emergency. The Pentagon has not declared those bases "operational," but officials say they would work anyway once certain mechanical blocks are removed from the interceptors themselves. Six interceptors are at the Alaska site, with two more in California as a backup. Up to 10 more will go into silos in Alaska this year, officials say.

http://www.krsjv.com/Kwaj%20Brochure.pdf

Deep Throat

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Binge Drinking and pot use....sounds good!

Study: Utah, Oregon and the South have lowest rates

WASHINGTON - Utah, Oregon and states in the deep South have the lowest rates of binge drinking in the country, while states in the Midwest and Great Plains have some of the highest rates, says a government study released Monday. The problem was most prevalent in North Dakota, where an estimated 31 percent of residents 12 and older had engaged in binge drinking, according to the 2003 National Survey on Drug Use and Health. Binge use was defined as consuming five or more drinks on the same occasion at least once in the last 30 days.
North Dakota’s rate was nearly double the 16 percent rate for Utah, which had the lowest binge drinking rate in the nation, the survey found. Utah has a large Mormon population, and members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are forbidden to drink.
The survey builds on national data released last September which found that nearly 23 percent of all U.S. residents had gone on drinking binges.
New Hampshire tops in pot use
Utah also had the lowest rate of illegal drug use among residents 12 and older: About 6 percent had used illicit drugs in the past month. That was half the 12 percent rate in Alaska, which was the highest in the country. The national average was just over 8 percent.
“While we as a nation are making overall progress in reducing illicit drug use among youth, it is clear from the findings that illicit drug, alcohol and tobacco use vary substantially among states and regions,” said Charles Curie, head of the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration. Many Southern states had rates under 20 percent for binge drinking, while the rate in Oregon was 20.5 percent. Oregon, though, ranked among the top states for prevalence of marijuana use: Nearly 9 percent of residents age 12 and older had used marijuana in the last month. Oregon and other states that showed high marijuana use in the survey, including Colorado, Montana, Maine and Vermont, have laws that allow people to grow, smoke or obtain marijuana for medical needs with a doctor’s recommendation. The state with the highest rate, New Hampshire at 10 percent, does not have such a law. Marijuana use was lowest in Utah at 4 percent. National results released in September found that fewer American youths were using marijuana, LSD and Ecstasy, but more were abusing prescription drugs. The survey also found that youths and young adults were more aware of the risks of using pot.

Monday, February 14, 2005

Hamdog/Luther Burger

Southern Food Frustrates Health Officials
Email this StoryFeb 13, 12:22 PM (ET)By DANIEL YEE
DECATUR, Ga. (AP) - When Becky Cleaveland is out with her girlfriends, they all pick at salads except for the petite Atlanta woman. She tackles "The Hamdog." The dish, a specialty of Mulligan's, a suburban bar, is a hot dog wrapped by a beef patty that's deep fried, covered with chili, cheese and onions and served on a hoagie bun. Oh yeah, it's also topped with a fried egg and two fistfuls of fries.
"The owner says I'm the only girl who can eat a whole one without flinching," Cleaveland said proudly. Amid a national obesity epidemic and the South's infamous distinction as the "Stroke Belt," health officials have been trying to get diners to flinch, at least a little, at the region's trademark fried and fatty foods.
But nutritionists have found it's hard to teach an old region new tricks. How can Southerners give up delicious staples fried chicken, fried seafood, fried green tomatoes and cornbread slathered in butter?.....
Back at Mulligan's in Decatur, owner Chandler Goff is quick to point out that the bar also offers healthy alternatives, such as salads and sandwiches that aren't deep-fried. But he acknowledged that the "Hamdog" and the "Luther Burger," a bacon-cheeseburger served on a Krispy Kreme doughnut bun, are what draw attention.
As for Cleaveland, she says she doesn't think about cholesterol. "I probably should, but I do not. I'm only 25, maybe later." For now, she's able to maintain her 5-foot-7, 115-pound physique without regular exercise.

Live Forever?

WELLESLEY, Mass. -- Ray Kurzweil doesn't tailgate. A man who plans to live forever doesn't take chances with his health on the highway, or anywhere else.
As part of his daily routine, Kurzweil ingests 250 supplements, eight to 10 glasses of alkaline water and 10 cups of green tea. He also periodically tracks 40 to 50 fitness indicators, down to his "tactile sensitivity." Adjustments are made as needed. "I do actually fine-tune my programming," he said. The famed inventor and computer scientist is serious about his health because if it fails him he might not live long enough to see humanity achieve immortality, a seismic development he predicts in his new book is no more than 20 years away.
It's a blink of an eye in history, but long enough for the 56-year-old Kurzweil to pay close heed to his fitness. He urges others to do the same in "Fantastic Voyage: Live Long Enough to Live Forever." The book is partly a health guide so people can live to benefit from a coming explosion in technology he predicts will make infinite life spans possible.
Kurzweil writes of millions of blood cell-sized robots, which he calls "nanobots," that will keep us forever young by swarming through the body, repairing bones, muscles, arteries and brain cells. Improvements to our genetic coding will be downloaded via the Internet. We won't even need a heart. The claims are fantastic, but Kurzweil is no crank. He's a recipient of the $500,000 Lemelson-MIT prize, which is billed as a sort of Academy Award for inventors, and he won the 1999 National Medal of Technology Award. He has written on the emergence of intelligent machines in publications ranging from Wired to Time magazine. The Christian Science Monitor has called him a "modern Edison." He was inducted into the Inventors Hall of Fame in 2002. Perhaps the MIT graduate's most famous inventions is the first reading machine for the blind that could read any typeface.

Red Deadly

Hey There:
The Rock Alliance that is The Red Deadly has TWO shows coming up this week if you need to rock:

PAOLA’S
(Next to the Alladin Theatre on Milwaukie Ave/Powell) Friday February 18, at 10:30 P.M., FREE FREE FREE, we will play until about 12:30, Friday February 18, It is also my Birthday Party!!! (see attached BIRTHDAY ANNOUNCMENT) Free Free

ASH STREET SALOON (downtown)
Sunday, February 20 (we hit the stage at 11), Cost: under 8 bux, Tsunami Benefit show with F*ck If I know, Rosa Noir, MCM Highway American Roulette and The Red Deadly.

World's Best Soup! From the White Eagle

West African Chicken-Peanut Soup

Yield: 6
Ingredients
1 c cooked chicken; diced
2/3 c onion; diced
1 1/2 ts garlic; minced
2 tb oriental; (dark) sesame oil
1 1/2 ts curry powder
1/2 ts salt
1/2 ts black pepper
1/2 ts red pepper flakes
3 c chicken broth
1/4 c tomato paste
1 c stewed tomatoes; drained, chopped
3 tb chunky peanut butter

Instructions
In a large pot, saute the chicken, onion and garlic in the oil for about 10minutes, until the onion is tender.
Add the spices and saute 1 minute more.
Add remaining ingredients, stirring until well-combined.
Heat until very hot but not boiling. Serve immediately.

Per serving: 126 Calories (kcal); 6g Total Fat; (41% calories from fat);12g Protein; 6g Carbohydrate; 20mg Cholesterol; 704mg Sodium

This soup is the best soup I have ever eaten. The White Eagle has it every Thursday and most Saturdays.

China's Big Export

When it comes to spying, Beijing likes to flood the zone
By BRIAN BENNETT

Sunday, Feb. 13, 2005 Ning Wen and his wife were arrested last fall at their home office in Manitowoc, Wis., for allegedly sending their native China $500,000 worth of computer parts that could enhance missile systems. As these naturalized citizens await trial, similar episodes in Mount Pleasant, N.J., and Palo Alto, Calif., point only to the tip of the iceberg, according to FBI officials keeping tabs on more than 3,000 companies in the U.S. suspected of collecting information for China. A hotbed of activity is Silicon Valley, where the number of Chinese espionage cases handled by the bureau increases 20% to 30% annually. Says a senior FBI official: "China is trying to develop a military that can compete with the U.S., and they are willing to steal to get [it]."
But instead of assigning one well-trained agent to pursue a target, "the Chinese are very good at putting a lot of people on just a little piece and getting a massive amount of stuff home," says a U.S. intelligence official. The number of Chinese snoops is staggering, if only because average civilians are enlisted in the effort. FBI officials say state security agents in China debrief many visitors to the U.S. before and after their trips, asking what they saw and sometimes telling them what to get.
The FBI, severely criticized for its investigation of physicist Wen Ho Lee in the mid-'90s, has added hundreds more counterintelligence agents and put at least one in every Energy Department research facility. The bureau also started cooperation initiatives with corporations, but still sees universities as a soft spot, with some 150,000 Chinese currently studying in the U.S. The FBI's three most recent counterintelligence arrests were of suspects who had held student visas at some point. To help sort the few who go to America to spy from the thousands who go there for a better life, the FBI relies heavily on Chinese informants. Says a high-ranking Silicon Valley agent: "We have almost more assets than we can deal with."

— With reporting by Timothy J. Burger and Elaine Shannon

From the Feb. 21, 2005 issue of TIME magazine

The Beard Dealing with Failure

Last week on my clinical rotation I was enlisted in removing a breathing tube from a patient. This would be my first "extubation." When I received the order I was excited, as I usually am with a new procedure. I mentally went over the procedure, finished my coffee and headed up to the Critical Care Unit. I was stepping out of the elevator when it dawned on me that none of the intubated patients in the CCU had spontanous respiration. I had been up earlier to do ventilator checks (paperwork) and none of these patients were near being able to breath on their own. As I left the elevator I realized I was about to withdraw "vital therapy" , put bluntly, I was going to nudge someone into eternity. As I walked down the hall I may have said, even aloud "I am going to kill someone." I was not prepared emotionally for the task. As a former radiology tech I know that while everyone in medicine talks about being exposed to death, most medical workers rarely deal with death and fewer than that help facilitate it. When I am emotionally unprepared for something it is usually my way to just do it. This has probably profitted me more than it costs, I think this is compensitory, because I am a sensitive person. By the time I had the order in hand "D/C O2 therapy, per MD request", I was a white coated robot. As I entered the room I realized this was the same patient I had drawn my first real blood gas (a painful procedure used to obtain arterial blood) from a week earlier. Thankfully he was unconcious then and I assumed he had been all week. As his large extended family (tearfully) left the room. I felt better as if they had all given consent and I was helping them do something they could not. I thought about saying goodbye to my own grandfather, which I have yet to do, but have imagined doing. I realized I had to put this out of my mind. I thought what had brought this gentleman and I together, I had poked and prodded him the week before and now here I was to end him. Technically a series of strokes had done the brunt of the work, I reasoned the sin was not taking away his air, but cruelly prolonging his life. Strangely I did feel as if I was his nemesis. I turned on the overhead light and closed the door. My supervisor stood silently in the corner. I put a pad on the old mans chest, I put on some gloves, got a 5mL syringe, I hooked it to the tube and removed the air from the bladder on the distal tube, in one fluid motion I removed his breathing tube and feeding tube. I had forgot to turn off the alarms on the ventilator. They all begin to ring, I quickly muted them, to make up for my forgetting the alarms, I jerked the cord out of the wall. I then put the mucus covered tubings on the pad, bundled it all up and threw it (actually tossed it!) in the red bag a few feet away. Instantly his already low vital signs begin to nose dive. I was surprised at how quicky it had happened. I was glad it was over and felt priviliged for doing the work. My supervisor had told me he was impressed and had considered not letting me do it. So here I am gloating over my kill, when the nurse asks me to put a nasal cannula on the patient (oxygen). I said I didn't think that was a good idea and the nurse (not a big mean one, but a young atheletic one touched my shoulder and said "humor me") I am stupid and because of this quickly set up a nasal cannula and set it to 2 liter per minute. I reasoned since this gentleman was barely breathing he would continue to go, so whats the harm if I put a little Oxygen on him. He continued to nose dive and was probably minutes from death, the family were told they could come back in, most did not, probably thinking it was over. I left and went to another room to suction a another patient, I came back ten minutes later and the guy had good vital signs. The nurse had turned up the oxygen and placed the cannula in his mouth. So a week later he is still not awake and has been moved to medical ward. I have killed no one. He is not going to get better and in the meantime will cause the family emotional and financial distress. I realize my mistake and have learned from it. What I take from this experience is that the process is not more important than the outcome. From this sad episode I got to go to labor and delivery and watch a C-section. The baby was healthy and I got to stand directly over the surgery for open and close. I enjoyed this more than my attempted euthenasia. If you have read all of this please comment to say if you think I am flippant about this, it has troubled me that I feel guilty for not letting someone die.

Friday, February 11, 2005

Bottom of Everything

So there is this woman and she was on an airplane, and she's flying to meet her fiancé, sailing high above the largest ocean on planet earth, and she was seated next to this man, who, you know, she had tried to start conversations, and only, really the only thing she did heard him say was to order his Bloody Mary. And she's sitting there, and she's reading this really arduous magazine article about this third world country, that she couldn't even pronounce the name of, and she's feeling very bored and very despondent, and then uh, suddenly, there's this huge mechanical failure and one of the engines gave up, and they started just falling in thirty thousand feet, and the pilot's on the microphone and he's saying, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, oh my God, I'm sorry," apologizing and, and she looks at the man and she says, she says "where are we going?" and he looks at her, and he says, "we're going to a party, it's a birthday party. It's your birthday party, happy birthday darling. We love you very, very, very, very, very, very, VERY much." And then he starts humming this little tune and it kinda goes like this:

1-2, 1-2-3-4
We must talk in every telephone, get eaten off the web
We must rip out all the epilogues from the books that we have readAnd to the face of every criminal strapped firmly in a chairWe must stare, we must stare, we must stare
We must take all of the medicines too expensive now to sellSet fire to the preacher who is promising us hell
And in the ear of every anarchist, that sleeps but doesn't dream
We must sing, we must sing, we must sing
And it'll go like this:
While my mother waters plants, my father loads his gun
He says, "Death will give us back to God, just like the setting sun is returned to the lonesome ocean"
And then they splashed into the deep blue sea
It was a wonderful splash
We must blend into the choir, sing a static with the whole
We must memorize nine numbers and deny we have a soul
And to this endless race for property and privilege to be won
We must run, we must run, we must run
We must hang up in the belfry, where the bats in moonlight laugh
We must stare into a crystal ball, and only see the past
And in the caverns of tomorrow with just our flashlights and our love
We must plunge, we must plunge, we must plunge
And then we'll get down there, way down to the very bottom of everything
And then we'll see it
Oh we'll see it, we'll see it, we'll see it
Oh my morning's coming back, the whole world's waking up
Oh the city bus is swimming past, I'm happy just becauseI found out I am really no one

On Francisco Franco

On Francisco Franco written by  Charles Few Americans know much about Francisco Franco, leader of the winning side in the Spanish C...